I CURRENTLY feel like I’m trapped in an episode of Location Location Location.

I’m house hunting every other day and then when we get home, I’m forced to watch whatever god-awful property programme is on the box.

Homes Under the Hammer, Escape to the Country, Restoration Man, Amazing Spaces, Phil Spencer: Secret Agent, and of course, Location itself, which seems to be on TV more than Top Gear.

I’m getting to the point now where I’d live in a cardboard box, so long as it has a downstairs loo and is near a good school.