Losing the person you love and living with the fear that one day they might not recognise you – this is the heartbreaking human impact of dementia.

Janet Mitton, who has cared for her husband Brian since he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease six years ago, spoke to The Bolton News about her experiences.

BRIAN Mitton was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease in 2009, but doctors believe the illness first began to take hold in 2006.

Looking back, his wife Janet says she can see the signs were there — but at the time the diagnosis was the last thing she expected.

The retired couple, of Mendip Close, Breightmet, have been married 30 years this year and have six children between them from previous marriages.

Janet, aged 65, has been caring for 80-year-old Brian for six years. He now finds conversation difficult and can forget what has happened within ten minutes.

She said: “You lose the person you love — but you do try and hold onto them as well as you can.

“Sometimes I see flashes of my husband, the man I married.

“We have a glass of wine in the evening and it is a ritual, our time at the end of the day where we sit down and listen to music — Shirley Bassey is his favourite.

“Those are lovely, very special times when I get a glimpse of my old Brian.”

Brian is originally from Ferryhill in County Durham but left the north east when he was 15 to play professional football for Tottenham Hotspur.

He returned home but soon came to play football for Bury FC — in his working life also serving in the army and working as a bricklayer and for ICI.

Stockport-born Janet ran many pubs and restaurants, with the couple running the Queens Hotel in Rothbury, Northumberland, before they retired.

Janet, who is on the committee of Bolton Dementia Support, said she wants to speak out so people can better understand dementia and know help is out there.

The mother-of-two said: “Brian is living with dementia, not dying with it.

“While he is with me I want him to be happy, enjoy life and know that he is loved so much.

“It is so important people know that while what is happening is a lonely thing, but the more people you know and the more help you get, the more able you are to help the person you love.

“Dementia is not physically recognisable, so if people understood it better they could be more understanding towards sufferers.”

Janet said she and Brian have always enjoyed travelling but now Brian’s disorientation in unfamiliar surroundings mean holidays are not an option.

She said: “I am angry at what has happened because I wanted to spend the rest of my life doing things with Brian – we have been all over the world on some fabulous holidays but we can’t do that anymore.

“The closeness is what has been lost.

“I miss the everyday things – talking, holding hands, going out for meals.

“There is still a lot of love there, but the closeness is what has been taken away more than anything.

“Our future together has been taken away.”