THIS will be the last edition of The Wonderer – but before I go, can I congratulate Chelsea on remaining unbeaten over the international break?

A Charlton fan was arrested this week for trying to punch Crystal Palace’s mascot Kayla the eagle. This isn’t like trying to give Lofty the Lion a Chinese burn – it’s a real live eagle.

He might appreciate a bit of Cockney slang coming from that neck of the woods. So if found guilty, he’ll be doing a bit of bird*.

A Millwall fan has called his kid Bermondsey Millwall Den. I mean, how ridiculous. Who supports Millwall?

Tottenham and England man Deli Ali has had a good week, scoring against France and coming up with this great one-liner on Twitter: Microsoft bought Skype for 8.5 billion dollars. LOL idiots! They could have downloaded it for free.

Wayne Rooney hit the headlines by taking a starring role in WWE and smacking wrestler Wade “King” Barrett last week. By hitting the target twice in a week he is now on his best scoring streak all season.

Barrett, a Preston fan is 35 – and that is also the number of minutes of Premier League football you need to have played these days to earn an England cap from Roy Hodgson.

After the non-event that was the Manchester derby, Sky Sports kept advertising for this weekend’s El Classico quiet, that way they’d avoid waking up the people who watched the game at Old Trafford.

Many people in Scotland are disappointed that they never achieved independence after the referendum. It appears they’ll get their wish this summer – because the rest of us are going to the Euros.

Former England international Kieron Dyer is on I’m a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here!

I’m struggling to believe it. Kieron Dyer was an England international?

At 15 American striker Freddy Adu was forecast to be the next Pele. This week he was promoting a new vacuum cleaner on Twitter. Now that sucks.

Leyton Orient's players have been punished for a poor run of form in League Two by being made to stay in a hotel all week - at the orders of owner Francesco Becchetti.

You might think that sounds cushy, but bear in mind it was a Travelodge.

*Birdlime = Time.

Peace out.