I do not own a fax machine,

Computers have I none.

I don't possess a motor car,

How will I carry on?

My pots and pans I wash by hand,

No dishwasher you see.

But is my life a struggle?

Well no - it's not for me.

I do not use a mobile phone,

E-Mail or Internet.

To some, they may be useful,

But I don't need them yet.

I do not use a credit card,

Or take money from a wall.

So, when it comes to month end,

Do I worry? - not at all.

I don't take foreign holidays,

?The neighbours to impress.

Some people come back looking well,

But others - what a mess.

Why fly to some exotic land,

To lie out in the sun.

To be half-baked or medium rare,

Or, even worse, well done.

Some 'Golden Oldies' in their shorts,

Look like two-legged donkeys.

To see a few, it could be true,

That man came down from monkeys.

And what about these baseball caps,

With peaks turned to the back?

For those who wear them, it just seems?

A brain is what they lack.

No, I don't need these modern things,

I'm happy as I am.

And if you think I'm just a fool,

Don't worry - I'm happy. George H Platt

Lea Gate Close

Bradshaw, Bolton

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.