AS weddings become more extravagant hefty average invoices for the happy occasion have reached more than £17,000.

But, as writer Tracey Scott found out, planning your priorities can help make things more affordable . . .

IT seems as though the traditional wedding vows of I do' have been replaced with I want'.

The love and commitment that was once attached to the big day have been replaced with an expensive ceremony that could eventually lead to divorce reason: irreparable differences due to on-going financial difficulties.

Researchers have found that an average wedding now costs around £17,000, which means by the end of 2006 blissful Brits will have clocked up a staggering £23 billion on wedding expenditure. Seventeen per cent of marital couples will borrow the money usually on credit rather than prolonging the engagement and allowing enough time to save.

But despite rising costs, a great day is still possible on a reasonably prudent budget.

I went along to The Loft bridal lounge in Bridge Street, to find out how the happy couple can enjoy the full works without paying for the rest of their days.

Helen Statham says: "Really, it's about keeping things in perspective. Maybe if one particular aspect of the wedding is important for example, the dress extend the budget in that area."

On whether or not you should remove from the wedding list anything not regarded as a necessity, Helen said: "I would think so, yes. I think it is important to stick to the budget that you have.

"It is quite easy for the wedding to spiral out of control and for people to end up spending an awful lot more money than they initially intended.

"Although it is an extremely important day for all girls and so it should be at the same time it has to be kept real."

It has been reported that the average engagement ring costs around £1,300, with a person also spending £500 on the proposal night what happened to bending down on one knee in a poky restaurant?

The honeymoon has been estimated to cost an average of £2,800 again, what is wrong with a cheap all-inclusive deal booked on Teletext?

Helen said: "I think you could definitely get married on a lot less money.

"I think the problem is everything tends to be more expensive than what you first realise. It is a good idea to perhaps research how much things are going to cost in reality before you actually put a budget aside."

Although the bride and groom may seem unconcerned by their impending crippling debt, a sigh of relief can be heard coming from the father of the bride. A ceremony traditionally paid for by the bride's father has been replaced by one funded by the bride-to-be's mastercard.

The reason for the bride choosing to foot the wedding bill has been blamed on couples pushing back their wedding day until they are older. The average age at which a woman marries is now 30 years and seven months this figure has risen by more than three years over the past decade.

When asked if we are a nation that has lost site of tradition, Helen said: "I think it can be a little bit like that and again it boils down to the fact that people get carried away and overspend it is unbelievable really.

"The actual root of why we get married is sometimes lost in all the theatre and bravado of the wedding and all that goes with it. It is a shame in some respects."

A survey carried out by Alliance and Leicester found that many prosperous young couples believe their wedding would cost around £6,650. But for the benefit of those about to tie the knot the building society has compiled a chart to enlighten all future brides of the money behind the marriage. Here is a little taster of the prices you are predicted to pay hen night £365, invitations £150-£200, wedding rings £500-£1,000, dress £1,500, photographer £1,200, reception £6,100 and a prenuptial agreement: FREE.

And before you go flexing the plastic, do you realise that £17,000 could pay for university fees for two children, a deposit towards a new home, 25 cheap holiday deals to New York plus spending money, liposuction, tummy tuck, breast, nose and face reconstruction, more than 200 visits to a top London hair salon, a Mercedes A-class 150 or a BMW Z4 Roadster? Take your pick.

So let this be a reality check for all you brides-to-be. Take the time to seriously assess your financial situation and, fantastic if you can afford it, but, if not, why not wait?

Helen's top wedding tips

1. Keep everything in perspective
2. Always look for cheaper options especially if you have numerous bridesmaids 3. Set a realistic budget
4. Research your big day before you put your plans in motion
5. Start saving well in advance of the big day work the wedding into your lifestyle