WHERE are they now? used to be a popular feature in newspapers. It involved sports personalities of yesteryear, pictured in their heyday, before salaries soared into the stratosphere, especially in Premiership football. The stars involved were usually "found" behind the bar of a pub, or newsagent's counter. None lived in a mansion or drove Mercs and BMWs.

The return of The X Factor got me thinking about where are they now from that TV programme and similar so-called talent shows, Popstars, Pop Idol and Fame Academy.

The X Factor was bizarrely voted Best Comedy Entertainment Programme at the British Comedy Awards in 2005, because of painful attempts by many of the 12,000 hopefuls to impress Simon Cowell, Louis Walsh and Sharon Osbourne, despite a glaringly obvious lack of talent. They are so bad it is comical, though I am saddened that we are laughing at some poor sod's self-delusion, which brings the inevitable acid putdown from "Ubersturmfuhrer" Cowell.

There have been similar shows since time began, run by people with a talent for making money off the backs of people who had, or thought they had. The first I recall was Carroll Levis' Discoveries in the early post-war years. He toured towns, staging variety shows, using unknowns. Hughie Green took it further with his televised Opportunity Knocks, which ran from 1964 to 1978, and built significant careers for Les Dawson, Frank Carson, Mary Hopkin, Little and Large, Peters and Lee, Lena Zavaroni and Tom O'Connor.

The first major televised talent show in recent years was Popstars in 2001. It triggered enormous public interest and produced the group Hear'Say, with Kym Marsh, Suzanne Shaw, Myleene Klass, Danny Foster and Noel Sullivan. Where are they now? Their debut single Pure and Simple and album Popstars both made Number One in the charts, and Pure And Simple became the fastest selling single of all time, but the group have since experienced mixed fortunes.

Kym had a couple of Top Ten hits as a solo artist and is in the cast of long-running soap "Coronation Street". So everyone will know where she is: behind the bar in the Rovers Return. Suzanne had a child with entertainer Darren Day, described by red tops as a "love rat", whatever that is, though he dumped Suzanne and their son. Myleene hosts TV programmes on Channel 5 and satellite but it would be difficult to locate Noel and Danny.

David Sneddon and Alex Parks, winners of the BBC's Fame Academy in 2002 and 2003, have also disappeared off the pop charts radar. So have Steve Brookstein, X-Factor winner in 2004 and Michelle McManus, Pop Idol winner in 2003. Michelle bolstered the ego of large ladies everywhere, defying her own weight problem to win. After an initial Number One, chart success has eluded her. Wrong image, I suppose.

Gareth Gates, runner-up in Pop Idol season 2001-2, won hearts by beating his stammer but lost to Will Young, the biggest success of the lot. According to the tabloids, Gareth had a ding-dong with Jordan before she met Aussie hulk Peter Andre. Gareth hasn't surfaced for a while. Where is he now? Perhaps hidden in Jordan's ample bossom.